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Confusing
External Things with Internal Responses:
“Why
are men so completely lost in the sight of a
beautiful female body?”
“Probably
for several reasons.”
“Like
what?”
“Well,
for starters,” she replies with a sigh, “Our
culture distorts and dishonors our sexual
nature.
For example, in American society, its
perfectly okay to use female bodies in
bait-and-switch advertising to sell men almost
anything you can imagine — except sexual
fulfillment.”
“What
else?”
“The
sight of naked women has been denied to most men
for most of their lives.
When was the last time you looked at a
woman as you are looking at me right now?”
“I
never have. I’ve seen naked women before but never the way we are
here today.”
“And
after you have seen a couple dozen beautiful
women as openly and as freely as you are looking
at me now, the female body will take on a new
meaning.
It will still be a joy-filled experience
under circumstances like we are sharing today,
but much of the mystery and the mystique will be
gone.”
“I
like the mystique.
It’s exciting.
It makes me feel good.”
“Of
course! That’s a very delightful part of interrelating,
particularly in the first stages of the sexual
game.
Can you also see that it’s the internal
feelings of joy and pleasure that we’re after
and not the external trappings or the naked
bodies that inspire those feelings.”
“So
you’re saying that by sharing your body with
me, you’re inspiring me to feel good?”
“Was
that a question or a statement?”
“Both,
I guess.”
“Then
pose it as a question and answer it yourself.”
“I
think I’m missing something.”
“OK.
What are you after?
My body or the feelings you feel inside
yourself as a result of playing sensual/sexual
games with me?”
“Both,
I guess.”
“Let’s
approach this from a different angle.
Sit up here beside me.
We need to temporarily break the sexual
cycle anyway, and this will be a perfect way to
do so.”
I sit on the couch and Jazbell continues.
“Do
you need a job?”
“I
like to eat and have a bed to sleep in.”
“I
didn’t ask about food or your bed.
I asked you if you need to have a job.
If I gave you ten million dollars, would
you need a job?”
“No,
of course not.”
“So
a job is not a goal.
A job is a way to get money, a means to a
desired end.”
“I
get that.”
“Good.
Now, we’re on the right track.
If you had a perfect home for yourself
— for example, suppose you owned a home like
this one, and you had completely free and total
access to go anywhere and do anything and have
anything you could ever want, would you still
need money?”
“No.”
“So
money‘s not the goal either
Your desire is for the goods and
services, and money is a means to access those
goods and services.”
“Right.”
“And
what do you get from those goods and services?
For example, what do you get from your
bed?”
“Satisfaction,
comfort, peace of mind,
security, pleasure.”
“Are
those external things, or are they feelings and
states of being?”
“They’re
all feelings and states of being.”
“Good!
You got it.
The ultimate goal of all human beings is
to generate internally the state of being we
call ‘feeling good.’
Unfortunately, we tend to confuse the
external means with the internal goal. We get lost in the physical world and lose our inner selves
in the process.”
“Yes,
I suppose I do that.
Doesn’t everyone?”
“Jazbell looks and me and smiles, “Stoney,
if everyone tied one hand behind his back, would
you do the same?
What we're talking about is bringing
consciousness into your life so that you can
live by intention and not by accident or
default. I’m inviting you to stop living your life as a robot,
to stop being a mechanical man. I'm
inviting you to wake up and become aware of how
life works and what's really going on, to become
aware that it’s pleasurable, internal feelings
you're after, not the external trappings. For
example, why are you playing with my body?”
“Jazz. that's obvious! Because I enjoy it. You’re
an incredibly beautiful woman and touching you
makes me feel
good.”
“And
where is the ‘feel good’?”
“In
me.”
“Do
you see that I’m not the source of your
feeling good?
You
are the source of your feeling good.
I am an external inspiration out of which
you create, within yourself, your own internal
feelings of pleasure.”
“True,
but I never thought of it that way before.”
Jazbell
continues,
“Can you now see that your intention to
manifest what we’re presently sharing comes
from a desire to feel good and not from a desire
for the external thing itself.
Feeling good is the goal, and our sexual
sharing is a means to that end“
“Yes,
I see that.”
“Yet
some people would find what we are sharing here
today to be disgusting and revolting. For them, the same external circumstances that are
creating joy for us would create a totally
different internal response for them.”
“Yes,
but what has all this to do with our sexual
sharing?”
“It’s
at the feeling level that we contact our true
nature, and orgasm is the ultimate
‘feel-good’ for any human being.
Believe it or not, orgasm is as close as
most humans ever get to experiencing who they
really are.
As sexual partners, we help each other
open up and connect with the ecstasy of God.”
“So
you really mean it when you say that sex is a
spiritual experience?”
“It
certainly is for me. “
I
say to her, “Well, you know it isn’t for
most people.”
“Yes,
I’m aware of that,” she says.
“And, like everything else in the
external world, sex is what we each make of it
by our thoughts, beliefs, attitudes, words, and
actions.
But enough mental stuff for now; let’s
get back to the fun part. Are you ready to be stripped?”
“I
was ready some time ago.”
“You
were too ready.” she laughs.
“We needed to break your sexual
cycle.”
“What
about your cycle?
Did that need to be broken?”
“No,
not really.
Actually, because I’m highly skilled in
the Tantric arts, I could go either way, but,
even for me, breaking the cycle was the optimum
response.”
“Why
is that?”
“Do
you remember me telling you that the most
pleasurable and most intense orgasms come as a
result of a series of sexual stimulations, each
being a little more intense that the one before
it?
“Yes.”
“And
with extended periods of sexual ecstasy as the
stated intention, a frontal charge to orgasm is
extremely counter-productive.
It’s like approaching a stray cat.
If you run after it, what happens?”
“It
runs away.”
“And
so it is with sexual ecstasy.
You may catch it briefly with a bulldog
charge, but you can’t keep it that way.
The average male orgasm lasts for seven
seconds and occurs about three times a week.
That is definitely not sexual ecstasy.
What we’re talking about is something
quite different.”
“And
that is . . . ?”
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